The Costanza Method – Part 3
February 14th, 2007 by PhilaLawyer
Ne mangez pas l’acide marron.
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Hah! Your stories almost make me want to try my hand at BIGLAW. Almost. Sometime I should tell you about how I accidentally put a guy in jail for a year for jerking off.
What I wouldn’t give to have an interview with you instead of these douches I’m stuck with…call me old fashioned but I consider blowing smoke up someone’s ass to be the kind of intimate activity best saved for when it can get me something worthwhile…
What happened to the legaleise piece? Too many pansies complain it was over their head?
ah too short! hope you do update this week.
can we launch some sort of book count down javascript? :)
I remember the interview process. The first few I was nervous for, so I began drinking the night before an interview. I’d drink like I didn’t have to be up until 2 pm when in reality I had an 8 am meeting with ‘s accounting firm. It helped. I’d shower, pop some Excedrin, throw on my suit and grab my folio with directions and be on my way. The first interview I showed up still buzzed/hung-over for I got a little nervous wondering if they could smell the booze on me. But after spouting out all the internal dialogue I was thinking and even questioning the female interviewer with “when I graduate I’ll have a degree that allows me to work at almost any accounting firm I want – why should I work at yours? What makes you different?” She fuddled with some pamphlets telling me to page through those as she desperately sought out legitimate answer. I had rocked her off her track. For 2 weeks I went through about a dozen interviews. They became generic. The same questions, the same pitches. Showing up with a left over buzz let that inner demon come out and it threw most for a loop. They didn’t know how to handle honesty.
“I got right in everyone’s’ face about it. Yes, these are bruises from fighting. Yes I’m okay with that.” – Edward Norton’s’ words echoed through my half awake skull.
I got call backs for all the interviews I showed up drunk/hung-over to (and I don’t have impressive grades). I got offers from all but one firm I got call-backs from.
PL: The real trick is to think “I’ll be dead in 40 years. This is just some crap to pay the bills. If not this one, I’ll get another.” That’s a lot harder than it sounds.
I must comment first on the guy who just posted about being hungover for his job interviews. I will make this brief. I had a interview with the GM of this place in the morning and the night before I was getting so drunk on gin that I forgot to set my alarm. I was late. And I didn’t care. I was calm, had a ‘fuck it’ attitude, and allowed that inner voice to come out as opposed to the more polished and refined one that normally comes out when trying to make a good impression. Blew it out of the water. Now, Philalawer, I am dying to finsh the costanza series. I believe your outlook on life is what most people are attracted to because they are unable to bring it out of themselves out of fear. Good writing.
Found a typo in this story:
“I didn’t need to breath into a paper bag.”
Should be “breathe.”
Word to your mother.
Another typo (I think):
“What are you going to cough…”
I think this should be “cough up” or “how much are you going to cough up.” Not sure though.