I’m editing a new piece, holiday-themed, which will start next week.  In the interim, this is a “ketchup” post – a few updates on things I’ve been remiss in providing.  Apologies on the delay in getting this information out.  I’ve been incredibly busy.

MEDIA

Apparently, the British media likes Happy Hour is for Amateurs:

* The Times of London thinks you ought to “Slope off” with a copy of Happy Hour is for Amateurs this Christmas.

* Happy Hour comes in at Number Four among the “Magnificent Seven Christmas Books for Lawyers.” (In an undeserved but much appreciated nod, the reviewer also compares the book to John Kennedy Toole’s A Confederacy of Dunces.)

LINKS

Below is a collection of links to sites you might enjoy.  When Rudius Media ceased hosting Philalawyer.net, it also ceased hosting a few other notable sites/boards.  If you’re a long time Rudius reader, you might be looking for them.  If not, you ought to consider reading them.

Shrinktalk

Dr. Rob needs little introduction. I’ve done multiple pieces with him in the past and continue to do so now.  Hopefully, in the near term, he will have a book coming out, a comic expose about life as a psychologist, and what goes on in the world of mental health professionals.  The guy’s a great, funny writer, and if you’ve ever wondered what goes through a shrink’s head – the kind who isn’t afraid to openly disclose what he’s thinking – this is a must read.

Hollywood Interrupted

I’ve written about Mark Ebner here and that’s about all that needs to be said.  This guy is a serious, hardcore journalist whose specialty is uncovering the sleazy underside to every Hollywood success story.  They all have one, and Mark nails it.  In a world of bought and paid for media and barely credible internet “scoops,” Mark’s the real article – a serious goddamned reporter who knows how to write, well.

The Idiot Board

One of the most improperly named forums on the web, this is a collection of people who used to post on the Rudius Message Boards.  There is no way to explain the place.  It’s one of the most eclectic collections of individuals you’ll find on any bulletin board, covering every topic imaginable but one – politics.  Which means it weeds out all of the flame wars and ad hominems you’ll see on every other board.  Unlike most bulletin boards, which tend to have an exclusive theme, this one’s wide open, and attracts an excellent crossfire of widely diverging views from people of disparate ages and backgrounds.

One other note…  While I have nothing at all against Snark (hell, it’s two thirds of my humor), the interesting and unique thing about this board’s culture is that the participants actively try to engage in constructive dialogue.  Too many boards devolve into a collection of posters trying too hard impress each other with dismissive, ironic quips.  The Idiot Board has some of that, and what’s there is biting and funny, but they do a fine job of holding it to a reasonable level so it doesn’t take over the conversation.  That’s rare on the Interwebs.

Attention Crash

This is a group of artists who used to post on the Rudius Media Boards.  Of particular interest is the “Speak No Evil” section, an area where writers, editors and board contributors critique submissions from prospective authors and discuss their own work.  It’s an excellent source of information and dialogue on all things related to both the craft and business of writing.

INTERVIEWS

I linked these before on Twitter, but neglected to do so here:

* A great interview on Danny Bonaduce’s WYSP morning show here.  (Scroll down in the Podcasts to “Bonaduce 102709 8AM, Entertainment, The Philadelphia Lawyer.” Interview starts at the mid-point of the clip.)

* An in-depth interview with Colin Marshall on “The Marketplace of Ideas” here.  (This guy asked amazing questions.)

TWITTER UPDATE

For those of you who refuse to join Twitter, below is the first of a Twitter update:

• “Economic Justice” (n.) – A buzzword of those holding little knowledge of either.

• “Genital Piercing. Because the other 1,458,752,917 better hobbies just didn’t seem to cut it.” #nopunintended

• The ‘79 Pirates came back from three down, but they were a much different team. And had access to a whole lot of really good coke.

• Generally, the stronger a man’s “beliefs,” the lighter his book shelf.  #justsayin’

• “Rachel Maddow. Removing the ’sexy’ from lesbianism one drier-than-week-old-dogshit sermon at a time. #vacantmediadarlings

• It’s not “Depression.” You’re just stuck doing work you loathe to pay for stuff you thought would fill in the blanks. It’s called “America.”

• Answer to “Why don’t law schools teach kids how to practice?” Because they’re near entirely staffed with teachers who couldn’t. #lawschool

• “Pro-Life Fiscal Conservative” (n.) – One who knows to howl about “entitlements,” but has no idea where they start. See also: Oxymoron.

• Populism = “We must have pay cuts at TARP companies!” Populism Fail = “Why are all the finance workers going to foreign firms?”

• I used to watch reality television. Now I sniff glue. Same brain damage, 1/10 the time. #efficiency

• The new Porsche Panamera and J.Lo… Both much more attractive from the front.

• No one “believes” in Evolution. We “accept” it because the scientific method validates it. #importantdistinctions

• “I’m not going to bid against myself.” Do people understand how technically moronic this statement is? #lawyers

• Re: introductions, lose the bone-crushing handshake. I understand you’re a “masculine” man. And I’m already 60% sure you’re straight.

• “Attorney” is to “Professional” as “Podiatrist” is to “Medical Doctor.”

• My opinion of Noam Chomsky? A brilliant, fascinating, and utterly preposterous individual.

• Is it me, or do the Moderates mutter and the Liberals whine, while every goddamned Puritan seems to have a bullhorn? #asymmetries

• Here’s a simple way states can save cash. Stop wasting millions on the death penalty. Is there an outlay with a worse cost/benefit ratio?

• Here’s a list of a few things they don’t tell you in law school. #lawschool #law #lawyers

• 1. Constitutional Law is interesting. It’s also pretty much useless. You’ll rarely, if ever, see a con law issue in a case.

• 2. Tax courses are the most important ones you’ll take. Be it in deals or settlements, tax impacts everything.

• 3. Take Bankruptcy, particularly in this economy. In deals or suits, it’s a great device to use, or use as a threat.

• 4. You wrote for your school’s “Law and Horticulture Review”? Waste of time. If it isn’t Law Review, no employer cares.

• 5. Being a deal lawyer? Fungible skill set that creates career options. Being a litigator? Ultimately, a dead end.

• 6. Brains are cheap. Book of business is everything. Can’t sell? Introverted? Get over it, and quick, or you’re dead.

• 7. Today, you’re better off going to a small firm where you can build a book than a big one where you’ll never do so.

• 8. Case cites are all cut and paste in practice. Memorizing the “Blue Book” is time better spent masturbating.

• 9. Your ability to read (and understand) financial statements is 50X more important than any Moot Court medal.

• 10. Take courses in post-judgment execution process. Shielding debtors’ assets from creditors is a growth industry.

• Simon Cowell isn’t laughing *with* you. Neither is Oprah, Kelly Ripa or Martha Stewart. #You’rethemark

• Non-ironic use of “No homo” = “Homo.” See also: Confused, Closeted, “Shit for brains.” (Inspired by/borrowed from @MarkEbner59)

• Re: Reality TV, is Hollywood cynically brilliant, or just lucky? Natively stupid enough to perfectly connect with the lowest common mind?

• Perjury (n.) – The remaining gas left in a courtroom after grandstanding and obfuscation have dissipated.

• It’s always been “medicinal.” We use to it cope with the other 60% of stressbags and neurotics in society who ought to be smoking it.

• A true conservative does not inflict his “family” or “traditional” values on others via legislation. He minds his own goddamned business.

• If we eliminated all the useless, revenue-sapping, chair-warming positions in our industries we’d have 50% unemployment. #JohnGaltisdead

• Most deliberately quiet people aren’t Don Drapers. They’re just self-aware enough to realize they come off a whole lot smarter silent.

• Proper response to “Well, you’ll be hearing from my lawyer”? “Okay.”

• Obama should fire Axelrod. This War on the Non-Left Leaning Media is beyond foolish. Gives the opponent exactly what it wants: Attention.

• Let’s discuss the Kardashians, and Nicole Ritchie. Then we can swap tips on how to decorate our double wides. #trailertrashnation

• How’s a lawyer reach 2400 billable hours a year? Standing on truckload of bullshit.

• People who would have really enjoyed each other’s company: Joseph Smith, L. Ron Hubbard and the Rev. Sun Myung Moon.

• “It’s only suborning perjury if you were dumb enough to have asked the client if he was lying.” – Oliver Wendell Holmes #lawschool #law

• Aggressive Regulation (n.) – Technique by which politicians fix greed and malfeasance of finance industry. By moving it to other countries.

• Re: 10,000, enjoy the cautious optimism. When the corp profits caused by cost-cutting abate next year, the markets will drop like a stone.

• The frequency with which one quotes Ayn Rand is inversely proportional to the length of time he’ll wait to seek a handout when challenged.

• Owner’s translation of Chinese characters tattooed on her inner thigh: “Life & Love.” Actual translation: “Frozen entrails. Perishable.”

• The correct response to an accusation of “moral relativism”? “Thank you.”

• White trash + Reality TV-induced obsession w/”celebrity” + ingenuity = Balloon Boy. A Horatio Alger tale for the age. #WelcometotheNewDumb

• A white collar or cuffs on a colored shirt isn’t an “executive” look. It’s geriatric, with a twist of “guido” and “pimp.”

• “The ‘Kate Gosselin Cut.’ Because you want your head to look like a botched circumcision.”

• Those “Green” issues of Vanity Fair, Time, etc. succeed in one regard – making it into my recycling bin faster than any others. #LikeSominex

• I’m actually in favor in favor of “Don’t ask, don’t tell.” In regard to people’s faith. “Testify” to your mirror, or in court.

• If you’re thinking of hiring a “life coach,” you need a lot more help than that.

• Justice of the peace in Louisiana refuses to marry interracial couple.  In other news, Eisenhower wins second term.

• Monogram acceptable? You’ve early onset Alzheimer’s. Monogram unacceptable? Every other instance.

• I’m not saying it’s plagiarism, but having all those Hobbits die at the end has to be copyright infringement. #PalinMemoir

• Those square toed Kenneth Cole-style shoes w/wide soles flaring out on the sides? Unless you ride to school on the short bus, lose them.

• If the “’70s bush” makes a comeback, what do women who’ve had permanent laser hair removal do? Merkins? #emergingindustries #retrotech

• Gunner #1: “Was the sex good?” Gunner #2: “She was sooo hot. It was incredible.” Overheard in no law school, ever. #lawschool

• Ardi (n.) – Not Eve.

• That big banks have paid back the Fed is immaterial. They were bridge loans to “capitalists” who deserved a lesson in how cash flow works.

• Reinvention isn’t optional in this economy. Do it on your own terms or it’ll be done for you. On someone else’s. #thenewsecurity=nosecurity

• Show me an advocate for economic protectionism and I’ll show you a man whose capacity to see into the future is measured in milliseconds.

• If the thinking classes of this country are socially liberal/fiscally conservative, I’ve one question: Where’s our party? #CanIGetaWitness?

• “Philadelphia. Because you need a place to stop and take a piss on the trip between New York and Washington.”

• NYTimes on Polanski:”70s Culture Collides w/Changed World.” Ah, yes. If only for the halcyon days of bell bottoms, disco and… child rape.

• Anyone think instead of a holiday in his name, maybe a better way of honoring Harvey Milk would have been to repeal Proposition Eight?

• The earth isn’t 5000 years old. You have exactly 5000 brain cells.

• If there’s a use for white wine beyond cooking, or getting the dog drunk, I’ve yet to encounter it.

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